I have been more… Emotional, intuitive, empathic? I’ve been MORE lately to be sure. It’s been causing disruptions in my relationships and constantly distracting me.

I feel frayed. Reactive… Even explosive at times.

Out of control…

I’ve been feeling dissapointed. With love, trust and friendship… With plans undone and not yet sure… With myself – my bristling behavior and consuming outbursts…

Yet, I’ve been good. I’m fine with it. All of this chaos seems right…

I haven’t mentioned it yet, but I put a lot on the table this last full moon. I intended to release, let go and dismantle all that might hold me back from fully expressing my enlightenment… To come back to BEing, to unlearn my discontentment and rekindle my natural rhythms.

All of these hightened sensitivities are opportunities. I can now notice the ways my ego is sneakily trying to edge its way into controlling my life. It’s not about the big things so much any more – it’s the small stuff, the details and every nook and cranny of my existence.

So, I welcome the tremors. I embrace the discomfort, the changes and the lack of changes… Onward through this dark night, until again the light of day illuminates the path with glory…

I am a proud kitty momma!

My youngest, Sammi, likes to snuggle…

Not so fond of photo shoots though….

This is Sammi’s “I’m over your shit, mom” face lol…

And this is his “really, mom?” warning look…

… before he gets up from our snuggles as protest to my repeatedly blinding him with lights on my phone…

So sassy! #proudmomma

tread carefully along a path
that sticks you with its thorns
injecting poison deep into you
tearing you apart from inside

·

if you are called to wage war
do not waste time tormenting
playing little games with yourself
falling in love with believable lies

·

break free trom the temptations
turn away from your jealousy
asking why you are feeling this
instead of merely owning all of it

·

refuse to play the part of worrying
warrior – always looking to defend
creating the battles in your head
always losing on one side –

·

just listening instead, to your gut
heart and head, informed by soul
churning and burning deep within
glowing pure with immortal knowing
·
uncomfortable and demanding
understandably you resist a bit
letting the truth sink in past ego
watching your illusions dissolve

·

release the tensions on your heart
breathe deeper to fill and share
let go of expectations once again
tread carefully so as not to snare

small problematic symptoms of a terminal underlying fear
making the change you think you might want, won’t fix everything
it’s not just a word, it’s never just a word with me and you know that
·
I can’t ensure your safety when I’m asking you to jump off reality’s edge
no parachutes of normality to bring us down softly if we don’t grow our wings
nothing but gravity to judge us – so I’m working on developing my magnetic bounce

·

why I should give in, play small and hide my most glorious blessings
why deny the abundance of my hope, faith and love, or the delights of my whimsy
you say it’s a small thing, that it’s just a word – but if so hard to accept, maybe it’s true

Warm, salty sea-air
Rushing over me
Coasting down hills
Legs tired from climbing

·

A cool October day
In the warm South of France
From Nice to Ville Franche
Now we are riding back

·

Not a care or worry
Frozen smile on my face
Breathing in this bliss
I breathe it out for every time and place

·

Shallow at first
I sip in a little bit more
Holding it, growing
Deep within my core

·

Expansion I gleen
Breath becomes easy
Gifting to myself
The joys I give freely

·

Just a slight resistance
Soon to wane and fade
The malaise of existence
Slowly slipping away

·

In and more, holding again
Simple yes, and divine
The pranja swirls as friend
Kundalini spiraling up my spine

·

Speeding up to slow
Rounding corners
Before letting go
Winding further down

·

Mediterranean beauty
Fragrance of honey and milk
Delicacies known fully
I cannot keep this to myself –

Ville Franche | October 2018