Fortune Dares Poetry Series: learning lonely

nothing to do but enjoy
room – deck
hills and trees and breeze
birds and their song
their angry cries to the clouds
to the rain
the softly falling rhythm and rhyme and lyric
dripping sweetly
lick it – catch it
it’s all now falling from your tongue
down your chin –
enjoy it:
the wine at the table
strangers who never stop smiling at you
smile as you eat their food
smile
you sleep under their roof
smile smile smile
when they talk they scowl
words question your smile
asking “what will you do today?”
justify to me your wanderings
they say
justify to me your pleasure and your coming
justify
I walk down the hill
when I walk up I must crawl
on my hands I will climb
but for now I walk on my side
down
to the beach
the water –
to the place of tide’s intercourse with land
to their baby
white and soft
to the sand
I bring what I ought
I took it all
my mind and my eyes
what did I have that I did not see?
I had cancer with me
we played together
I laughed when they told me I would die
it told them I would never know –
not cancer
the birds ate it –
they would have ate all the more
all that I would let them
and they chase if not let enough
so I drank the ocean
I drank the wine
daily by my plate
at dinner
all day
I drank and drank and drank
then I cried
for wine is bitter when drunk alone
baby got fussy
love could not be understood
not by those
drunk
alone
not fully can the lonely swallow
they crawl the hill back
to the strangers home –
the deck and the birds and the rain and the wine

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