Tag: commitment

Blessed Summer Solstice

It’s time. Time to harvest all that has been manifested since the darkest point of the year, 6 months ago. Time to prepare for the gradual turning inward as the days grow shorter for the next 6 months. It is the Summer Solstice here in the Northern hemisphere and on the Wheel of the Year, this is the node which correlates to the Full Moon energy of our monthly lunar cycles/phases.

Subtle but Saturating Significance

It is a time to reap what we have sown, but also a time to start thinking about the preparations we will need to make for the challenges and tribulations of the long, dark nights to come. This is a day of both celebration and commitment, of both looking back as well as forward. It is a chance to review our progress, reflect on our growth, reorient ourselves with our values and reestablish our devotion.

A powerful day indeed. I for one will be participating in full, with both a sunrise ritual to honor the growth and manifestations in my life these past 6 months, as well as a sunset ritual to dedicate myself to purposeful intentions for the next 6 months.

My personal Summer Solstice Rituals plan

Decoding the Signs

Already I’ve noticed something quite spectacular about the timing of my rituals today. There is a numerological theme. Both the time of sunrise and sunset here in my hometown reduce to 13/4.

I absolutely LOVE seeing patterns. I don’t believe in accidents or coincidences so they immediately stand out to me as signs and synchronicities. I also have a soft spot for numerology because it was the first form of divination I was ever called to.

This combination of numbers is potent and powerful. The 13 is a karmic number, and though it can often be met with resistance, it symbolizes great transformational potential. 1 is a number representing independence or the individual, and 3 a number of unbridled creativity – together these numbers can indicate that there is a need for personal manifestation.

13 is a call to come into your strength, revoke the excuses or justifications of your past, and step fully into the purpose of your destiny. I’m sure you can see why some might shy away from it. In its challenge for you to grow, there is an acknowledgment of having obstacles or set backs to overcome. For those unwilling to drop their ignorance and accept responsibility for their mastery, this number is an unwelcome and uncomfortable energy. Yet, for those of us already on our path of optimization, 13 is an accelerator, adding fuel to our already molten burning will to change ourselves and the world.

4 is a beautiful number as well, and not as turbulent as the 13. In fact, to some, 4 can be considered quite dull. It is the number of foundation and order.

Following the 13, I do not see this 4 as boring at all though – in fact, I believe it is just the opposite, especially for Summer Solstice. Just as we are putting to rest the chaotic efforts of the waxing energy of the past 6 months and replacing it with the waining energy of devotion and discipline for our purposeful intentions of the next 6 months, the 4 is following/completing the energy of the 13 in similar fashion. How synchronous indeed.

Enjoying the Magnificence

It is in this bliss of recognition that I begin my day and my observance. What a blessing to feel wrapped up in the divine and cosmic tapestry, in which every thread is meticulously and mindfully woven into place. What peace. What assurance. What appreciation and joy.

It is with this resonance of awe that I begin my rituals today, and it is with this same reverence that I will end my rituals this evening as well. In the blessing of a magickal life, I wish you all the same wonder and enchantments of today, for always.

Howdy Costa Rica

A soulful homecoming

Like the gentle yet persistent bubbling of a refreshing mountain spring, the joy and bliss in my heart enveloped me completely as we began our decent into San Jose this morning. Costa Rica, my beloved, how I’ve missed you! I hadn’t even realized how much until the tears started forming in my eyes.

“Thank you, thank you, thank you…” Overcome with gratitude for the opportunity to come back here again, I whispered my blessings to the clouds and mountains, and even to the big metal birds that provided my transport to this magical land.

Pura vida indeed. I hadn’t even touched down and already I was feeling the infectious soulfulness and spirit of this place… “This is truly Pachamama country,” I breathed to myself, absolutely elated at the thought.

Flying in to San Jose

Remembering the ease of spirit enraptured

Maybe it’s not like this for everyone, but personally, this country feeds the deepest and most potent parts of my being. I’ve had some doubts about my trip lately, nothing serious, but I came up against my old friend ego again, masquerading as perfectionism and control as I prepared for this journey. I’ve been trying to walk the line between devotion and beingness, but my doubts and insecurities had me feeling like I just couldn’t win.

I cannot count the times I’ve reviewed my behavior this week, looking for signs that I was still on the right track. “I think their might have been some dairy in that… Oh no, I forgot not to use onion! Damn, that weed smoke smells so good, I hope it blows my way just a bit – but maybe that’s not a good thing?” I haven’t been smoking, drinking, fornicating or eating off the dieta for over a month, yet I was still feeling insecure in my follow through on my commitments.

This is what I do. I am especially hard on myself, and not just when I have a reason.

This was a big lesson for me last year when I attended Apotheosis 1.0 and came to Costa Rica for the first time. I very plainly and painfully saw my own self-deprecation, self-inflicted frustration and my many other manipulative mechanisms of tyrannical self-control for what they actually were: ego drama and disease. I was guided into forgiving, having compassion and being gentle with myself – but I guess the freedom and healing that those things brought me had faded a bit over the past year. Sure, I wasn’t mercilessly berating myself for things that were completely out of my control anymore, but I wasn’t exactly being kind, patient and understanding either.

Big fluffy clouds over Costa Rica

I had already felt the tender nudges of Pachamama, attempting to guide me back towards my beingness while I was still at home preparing – but it wasn’t until I glimpsed this magnificent country again that I felt the glory of grace in all its fullness once more. “Ah yes, THIS. This unrestricted, unconditional love. This is what it’s all about… Yesss…”

I had been so worried about messing things up for myself that I had forgotten this trip, this soul journey is a gift. I am hear to enjoy my beingness, not to prove I deserve it.

Releasing my expectations

I’m letting go, again. I’m smiling ear to ear at strangers who cut me in line, with genuine compassion and care. I’m daydreaming about nothing but the moments I’m in… I’m embracing the unknowing, I’m accepting my imperfections, I’m surrendering to the fantastic hopelessness of not needing things to be different than they are.

We can know the nature of dislike, shame, and embarrassment and not believe there’s something wrong with that. We can drop the fundamental hope that there is a better “me” who will one day emerge.

– Pema Chodron, When Things Fall Apart

I am so incredibly grateful and that’s the focus I will maintain for the rest of this adventure. I’m not here to prove anything to myself or anyone else. I’m here to emerge organically, stripping away the needless labels and standards, to break out of the cocoon and take flight with the wings that have always been destined to be mine. I don’t have to know how, like a butterfly I will trust that my true beingness is inherent to me.

Costa Rica’s majestic landscape