Tag: throwback

Turning the Wheel

*One of those meditative visions while in the jungle (in 2018, not this past visit) learning how to remember Mayryanna*

Beneath the ocean, surrounded by endless blue
I met a humpback who taught me to dance true
and we both sang aloud under water together
twirling hand in fin; swell bubbles and glimmer

Then, a Whale Shark who showed me gliding
like liquid through currents, just under surface
Our movement magickal, no effort or trying
We traversed all distance but forgot all time

Finally, I faced a Great White, both motionless
calmly, he stared me down; intently, I stared too
both finally bending, only to rest our foreheads
peacefully placing our third eyes together

When I came back to dry land
I wasn’t sure where I had been,
what had I been given and how?
Still seated on the Shaman’s floor

I thanked the guides heartily
with prayers and meditation
and saved my wild curiosity
with no fear of my hesitation

Upon my healing, Shaman blew
Conch bellowing all around me
The ocean waves rhythm too –
salt and water blood echoing

“You carry the song of the ocean
Waves still dance in your heart
Adventures are your Homeland
Make peace with your power”

Trying to Walk the Midline

Coming back in
just to back out
You can’t have me
but can’t move on
·
Frustrated so –
ask me to go
Changing mind

reel me in again

·

Can’t you see you’ve been hurting me?
If you care so much, why can’t you try?
I see now, it was always about you –
You never wanted but your dream of me

not my reality, not my hard-sought truth

·

Accusing, you point
only to then recoil
I’m fucking with you

just not how you like

·

Sure “I don’t get you”
I must be “confused”
If I really understood

I’d think just like you – right?!

·

Can’t you see you’re clipping my wings?
If you love me why won’t you let me fly?
I know now how I must threaten you –
I never wanted to cause any kind of grief

but I know there can be no peace in lies

·

Don’t change for me
don’t you even try!
I don’t want anything

but your authenticity

·

It’s okay if we don’t fit
We don’t have to cut
or mame ourselves –

I’ll love you from afar

·

You don’t want me, so please let me go –
it doesn’t make you wrong or me right
We can be different and still appreciate

We don’t have to be together to love –

·

I’m not rejecting you, or your dreams –
but they are yours to have, not mine
I’ll always want your spirit to thrive

but it’s my responsibility to keep mine alive

·

Can’t you see, the limits your creating?
If you want freedom why draw lines?
I’m learning now, what love is for you –
All or nothing means choosing extremes

but I’ll keep on trying to walk the midline